As in I cant celebrate quite yet. I saw the Dr's today to get the results of my CT and PET. I always knew there was a possibility my PET would come back positive. It just never really occurred to me that I would be in the 25 % whose PET does come back positive. Unfortunately I am.
Quick update and info session: PET was on Friday, the way it works is they put some radioactive isotope in me with sugar water (essentially), areas of the body that are active and metabolising (like a tumour) suck up the yummy goodness (cancer loves sugar) and lights up like a big glow in the dark pinata.
So what does all of this mean? Well. There is some good news. My tumour has shrank to half it's original size. A result that the doctors are thrilled to see and expect at this point. My blood work is totally normal so white blood cells count and everything is to quote my Doc 'beautiful'. Problem is the mass that remains was glowing like... something that glows a lot. (Sorry got nothing) Soooo that means that i have a cancer that despite the odds is resistant to the conventional treatment AND in an effort to avoid radiation at the end of all this we need to switch up treatment.
Bottom line - prognosis is still excellent, we still have a lot of tools in our arsenal, I just have not got this quite in the bag as I thought.
Tomorrow I will begin a new type of chemo. The biggest difference is that I will get chemo three days in a row. The treatment is a lot more aggressive (yes that reads harder) and I will have some added on to my rounds so I will have 4 more 3 day session instead of 2 more 1 day sessions. Instead of being done mid-May I am looking at the end of June.
I would be lying if I tried to say that this does not bother me on many levels. However as I mentioned in an older post, the attitude has to be, by whatever means necessary. Of course it sucks. I'm scared, tired of being tired and really really want this to be done but it's not just yet. I have accepted all of this as part of my journey - I will come to accept this next step too - but right now it is like a very irritating co-worker you do everything to avoid. Eventually you have to go to coffee with them. And then maybe, just maybe you find out they are not as bad as you thought.
I am going to crawl into bed and watch something like Duck Dynasty for a bit, let myself wallow. Tomorrow is a new day, with new drugs and a new path to healing. Thanks for your support, love and good wishes.
xo
Hi Sara
ReplyDeleteMy sister (twin) was diagnosed a month after you (in Victoria) and so I have been with her at the chemo sessions. She'll have have the PET at the end of the the month. I would love to know how that is going for you as this may be a route for my sister Isabel too. She has the same kind of lymphoma and, like you, her dog died of lymphoma as well. My dental hygenist let me know about your blog. My email is frankcvs@gmail.com Wishing you well!!!!
Franka